Dealing with a breakup is not easy and people deal with this event differently. Others just want to be left alone while some choose to binge eat junk food like chocolate and crisps or spend a few days crying their eyes out. After a few days of feeling sorry for yourself, it is time to move on, and here are a few ways to deal with a breakup and feel whole again.
Questions to ask after a breakup
Before looking at ways one can deal with a break and get their head back into the game, there are a few questions that one can ask themselves.
- Did I cause problems in the interracial relationship or am I at fault?
- Did I repeat the same mistakes over and over again?
- Did I choose the wrong person to be in a relationship with?
- Could I have done things differently or handled things better?
- Was my partner in control of their emotions at all times?
- Was I in control of my feelings?
1. Share your experience
Talking to others about your breakup can be therapeutic especially if it is a discussion with people who have gone through a similar experience. Tell your story and seek guidance from people like a therapist, family, or even close friends to see where things went wrong. The advice they give you can prevent you from making the same mistake twice or highlight any red flag when you find yourself in a new relationship.
2. Be a social butterfly
Instead of sitting all alone at home, try to socialize because a change of scenery will do wonders for you. It will provide you with an opportunity to meet and interact with new people because you will need all the positive energy you can get after a breakup. Go out, laugh, and enjoy yourself with people who value and care about you the most as this is the only way to bring some much-needed sunshine into your world.
3. Stay clear of social media
We live in a social media age and with your ex only a few clicks away, how you go about things here depends on you. If you don’t want to see pictures of your ex or don’t want them to see what you’re up to, you can remove or block them on the platform you use the most. Out of sight, out of mind because if you are constantly reminded of them on social media, it will be harder to move on and get your head back in the game.
4. Take notes on what you’ve learned
You should always look at a breakup as an opportunity to learn and know if there are things you did or did wrong. Take a few notes if you want and always refer back to them as a way to help you find the ideal partner who is compatible with you in the future. A good amount of self-reflection can highlight some of the reasons why you and your ex didn’t work out.
5. Don’t abuse substances
When you have broken up with someone or your long-term mixed relationship has come to an end, you might be tempted to experience new things to deal with the pain. The one thing you should do is use food, drugs, or alcohol as a way to deal with the pain because these things are harmful to your body. You need to find healthy ways to cope with your break up like therapy, spending time with loved ones, or doing things you love.
6. Remember to move forward
When you speak to someone about your breakup or do things that you enjoy, you will not overanalyze things or have negative feelings building up. Emotions such as anger, reassessing, and blaming waste valuable energy and stop you from moving on. Get rid of these negative energies and always remember that the goal is to move on.
7.Focus on the future
When you commit to a relationship with someone, you see yourself spending the rest of your life with them and when things go wrong, those feelings and dreams you once held are very hard to let go of easily. As you go through the grieving process, you should take comfort knowing that the grass is greener on the other side. Old dreams are replaced by new ones, you can learn from the past relationship, pick up the pieces and be strong moving forward.
8. Know what depression is
Many people get paralyzed with grief when a relationship comes to an end but over time the sadness will go away. Time heals wounds and with each passing day, you will become strong and stronger after a breakup. However, if you feel like you are not making strides, you might be suffering from depression which is never a good thing and should seek professional help right away.
Professionals often advise people to not suppress their grieving process because this is unhealthy. It is normal for a person to go through a rollercoaster of emotions but the first step towards healing is acknowledging there is a problem and seeking help.